Chapter 19 Looking Back 1

"Time has passed and will never return. The past can only be recalled. Recalling the childhood, the bamboo and horses were green plums, and the two little ones followed day and night... The spring breeze blew red the stamens again. You have also added a new year, and you are going to change your mind. It's like time is hard to come back. I can only snuggle with each other in my dream..."

In the newly bought recorder, a mellow and gentle alto interprets this sad old love song in a low voice...

Bai Shu lay quietly on the mahogany chair in the living room, looking at the withered purple rattan waterfall on the stone railing in the distance of the yard, looking at the lonely budding white orchid at the door, looking at the darkening sky, her thoughts turned around, as if they had returned to the days many years ago, at that time It's the age of cardamom, the brightest days in my youth...

At that time, the spring sun was refreshing and clear, the wind was warm, the fragrance of flowers was sweet, and only sweat was salty...

In the dance room, 12-year-old Bai Shu'an's white face, bean-sized beads of sweat fell down one after another. She stretched her legs to the top of her head, and one hand trembled to hold the railing. Five minutes passed, and 10 minutes passed... Aunt Man, who stood in front of her, was still motionless, straight for an hour, two hours... Four After an hour, she turned around and left, but left a sentence fiercely: "Don't put your legs down until I come back..."

A beautiful teenager sneaked in from the door after Aunt Man left and quickly put a bottle of water on her lips. Brother Ruomin, I'm not thirsty..." The stubborn Shu'an turned his head, his face turned red, and he still gritted his teeth and insisted.

The teenager turned around and gently wiped the sweat on her face and said sadly, "Aunt Man is really cruel this time. Although you turned over her things without permission, it was wrong first... But she loved you the most before..."

Bai Shu'an couldn't help but let the tears fall. "This time I really hurt Aunt Man's heart. I'll bear the trouble myself. Brother Ruomin, don't worry about me. Let's go..."

The towel in Xiao Ruomin's hand wiped her face back and forth. Seeing that her eyebrows were locked, her face gradually turned white, and her warm face also frowned: "Don't hold on hard, why don't you rest first? I'll go to the door to help you control the wind. If Aunt Man comes back, I'll call you..."

"No, I can still hold on..."

"What are you doing here?" An angry rebuke woke up the panicked teenager, "I said, no one is allowed to come in. Do you want to be punished together?"

"Age Man, Shu'an can't hold on any longer. If you let her go, if you want to punish her, just punish me..." In the gap between Ruomin's bitter pleading, Bai Shu'an's body was shaky and suddenly fainted on the floor...

In addition to being distressed, Aunt Man had to end this punishment...

The soprano sighed three times, and the sad old love song was finally finished singing. Bai Shu'an still maintained the original posture of lying flat. She did not move, but the two lines of tears on her cheeks unconsciously slipped down her cheeks...

One day and one night does not make her easily forget the fact that this once most important person has changed. Even if she is exhausted and hungry, even if she doesn't care about everything outside the yard...

She was glad that in this silent corner, they temporarily forgot her, so that she could vent her fear and sadness from the bottom of her heart, and did not need to control her tears to slide down for no reason...

It is sad for her that she has never thought and tried before how she would continue without him...

The twilight had darkened. She tried to stand up and walked to the window, leaning against the transparent white window. It was faintly visible that a osmanthus tree in the garden was lush and growing well. Although there was no flower fragrance, there was a clear and gentle voice and a dim yellow light. She saw a nightingale perched between the branches and leaves flashing a pair of complex. Bright eyes looked at her.

A rapid telephone rang suddenly rang in the room, waking her from the silent look. When she turned around in a panic, she met a pot of begonia flowers next to the cabinet. The flowerpot fell to the ground, the ceramic jar fell to pieces, and several remnants were hidden in the mud. Looking back, the nightingale had already rushed to the eaves and flew away alone.

Lin Manyin's anxious voice came from the other end of the phone: "Shua'an, is it you? Why did it take so long to answer the phone?"

"Aunt Man, it's me. I was in the room just now. Isn't it in a hurry to come and pick it up?" In order to cover up the sadness in her heart, Bai Shu'an had to lie.

Man Yin's tone became soft: "Shua'an, things in Yuncheng are a little tricky. I'm afraid I can't go back to Yuecheng in a short time."

"Aunt Man, but I..." A messy rustle swept across the radio waves, mixed with the gentle voice of the distant radio hostess, covering up Bai Shu'an's slightly hoarse and choking voice. Man Yin did not hear anything strange, but explained apologetically, "Shua'an, I'm calling at the public phone booth, letter The number is not good, so I won't tell you more. Take care of yourself, and Ruomin. Tell him about the group and let him take more attention. I have told him the specifics before I left.

Bai Shu'an hopes that Aunt Man is by her side at this moment. From childhood to age, no matter what kind of grievances and pain she encounters, she doesn't have to be afraid, because she can turn around and jump into Aunt Man's arms. For the first time in her life, she feels that she has become a lonely person.

The microphone in her hand was thrown in her ear, but there was no familiar voice from Aunt Man at the other end of the phone. After saying goodbye anxiously, she took the lead in putting down the microphone, and only an endless and mechanical beeping sound came.

I don't know how long it took, Bai Shu'an still stood in the living room, looking at the broken ceramic flower jar, and at the simple furnishings that could not be more familiar here... She suddenly remembered the scene ten years ago, when she and Ruo Min happily ran around for the decoration of the yard.

We first met twelve years ago. Everything beautiful began from that time. After just two years, the reconstruction of the song and dance troupe was completed, and the brand-new comprehensive building stood up. The first batch of actors selected into the group were also very lucky to have their own courtyards. For the first time, they stepped into the newly decorated yard together, from which they started each other's dreams. Now, ten years have passed in a flash. She didn't expect that the dream would end so quickly and there was no warning.

She walked through the living room and went to the room, looking around the ornaments inside, a four-cornered white-painted Western-style bed, with beige wardrobes and bookcases on both sides.

Now she clearly knows that the upper part of the wardrobe is placed with the clothes of the four seasons in an orderly manner, while the lower part of the lattice is neatly arranged with various exquisite boxes.

They used to be her treasures. She carefully collected each one. She put them in the safest and most obvious place, looking forward to meeting them warmly every morning.

But now, people's hearts are gone, and even if I think about it, my heart hurts like a knife. She suddenly rushed into the room like crazy, opened the cabinet, and threw the full half-cabinet box into the air like the wind. The ground was quickly covered with colorful paper boxes, and silk scarves crawled out of the box, wrapped them together, and it was colorful...

She didn't expect that his habit of giving her gifts on New Year's holidays and business trips had been maintained for eight years, and the cumulative number over the years has been so large.

She didn't dare to look at it again, and she couldn't bear to touch it. She used her last strength to pick up those gorgeous and dazzling colorful silk silk, picked up the unceasing memories of the past eight years, and came to the storage room behind the yard...

As a silent farewell, she knows that no decision is more difficult than this moment. From then on, she will put this person who has imprinted in her heart like these boxes in a safe and secret place, without interruption or dispute...