377 The so-called heaven?

378

A spark crossed, and a wisp of smoke came from the cigarette butt, hitting the wall in the distance. The scattered sparks were finally annihilated on the ground, leaving only an unextinged cigarette butt floating smoke quietly.

"Hey" Yang Tian held the back of his head with his hands and leaned his back against the stone wall behind him. The stars were dotted in the sky. The night of Xia was still warm, and even a little dry and hot. The breeze blew and rolled up the sound of leaves rustling. Everything seemed so quiet.

In the distance, there were a few laughter from time to time, as well as the sound of basketball beating on the cement floor. Under the slightly dim light, a group of young people enjoyed the happy time freely. No one noticed the lonely figure integrated into the darkness in the distance.

It's been a whole week, a whole week.

Yang Tian closed his eyes silently, recalled the scene 7 days ago in his mind, and a bitter smile appeared at the corners of his mouth

"This is" Yang Tian sat in a chair in a daze, like a sculpture, sitting stupidly for a long time. His mind was full of bloody pictures and the sad and painful shouts of his teammates.

That heartbreaking shout made Yang Tian deeply immersed in the battlefield of the past. He couldn't extricate himself, and the dazzling computer screen was still open.

Archive 1, is it loaded?

Looking at the text printed on the computer and the countless wandering zombies in the big background, Yang Tian's eyes widened. Is this a dream? If it's a dream? Why is it so true? It really makes me miserable. If it's not a dream, then why did I come back here?

"Yang Tian, haha, you're here first!" A hand stretched out from behind, with a slightly excited voice. Two months later, they met again. The roommate dragged the suitcase. As soon as he entered the door, he saw Yang Tian sitting on the chair. He was very enthusiastic and wanted to pat Yang Tian on the shoulder, but what his roommate didn't expect was that Yang Tian's body suddenly burst up and grabbed himself. Forward hand

Yang Tian, who was immersed in consternation, did not hear the voice of his roommate, the click of opening the door, or even the sound of the suitcase pulley rubbing the ground. But when the person reached out and grabbed him, Yang Tian finally woke up. Subconsciously grabbed the hand stretched out, and his body cleverly reversed. , bumping his shoulder hard and looking at the person who fell into a table, chair and bench, Yang Tian stepped forward and punched the back of the person in the head

"Yang Tian! You are crazy!" The roommate shouted in shock, and Yang Tian's fist stopped in front of the person's head, less than ten centimeters

"What are you going to do?" The comer turned his head and tried to get up from the overturned table and chair. He looked at Yang Tian, who stretched out his fist and froze in place, with extreme dissatisfaction in his tone.

Looking at the strange and familiar face in front of him, Yang Tian was stunned for a long time. Finally, he squeezed out a smile on his face and smiled apologetically. He came to the computer and looked at the period in the lower right corner. There was no change. The time when he left here was a little blurred, but in his memory, like the period, there was no There is a slight change.

"Is the check-in done? I heard that we have changed the director this semester? The young man felt the depressing atmosphere in the room and thought of Yang Tian's strange behavior just now. He was not entangled in the matter of being knocked to the ground. He opened his mouth carefully and wanted to break the heavy atmosphere, but he did not get a trace of Yang Tian's reply. In the room, there was only endless silence, which was strange in the eyes of the young man. Yang Tian, who is different, has been staring at the computer screen stupidly

"Listen, I'm sorry." After a long time, Yang Tian finally opened his mouth and didn't wait for the young man to reply. Yang Tian had closed the computer, threw it into the cabinet, and walked out of the door, leaving only a young man who cursed silently.

On the street, young men and women carrying luggage and suitcases were walking, chatting and chatting, and laughing from time to time. On both sides of the road are trees swaying in the wind, the breeze is blowing, and the dazzling sun still emits its scorching light, and everything looks so beautiful.

Stop, stop, and look at a group of young people with lax eyes. Without pale skin and turbid eyes, there is no longer a roar in his ears, and there will be no more crying and screaming in the street. The strong contrast makes Yang Tian a little confused.

Now, Yang Tian finally got what he once wanted most, but he sadly found that he was so incompatible with the world that once belonged to him. The laughter in his ear seemed to laugh at himself, intertwined with the unprovoked roar in his mind, deeply stung Yang Tian's nerves.

Picking up the phone, one familiar voice after another appeared in the phone receiver. Everything was telling Yang Tian that this was not a dream. Maybe it was another real dream

Like an injured hedgehog, Yang Tian survived carefully and tried to make himself look normal. Perhaps silence is the best way, but Yang Tianzhen is powerless

Wake up from the memory, Yang Tian leaned his back against the stone wall and covered his face with his hands. Ironically, whenever he closed his eyes, the dark world was full of bloody scenes and corpses.

The painful words did not fade away as Yang Tian imagined. He always thought that those heavy memories would always dissipate slowly in the passage of time, but Yang Tian was wrong, made a big mistake, and the dazzling picture became clearer day by day. He closed his eyes, and his eyes were full of Rebia kneeling down, with the cost of burning life. I left the hope of survival, the huge and ferocious head, the sad roar inadvertently permeated in my throat, and the scene of soaked myself with drops of rich blood in my mouth.

At the moment when consciousness dissipated, the blurred voice in her ear became clearer and clearer at this moment. It was Kelly's cry full of worry, tearing Yang Tian's heart every minute and every second.

Yang Tian couldn't stand it anymore. He suddenly opened his eyes. The sad and beautiful pictures in the dark dissipated in an instant. His body trembled. Yang Tian took out a fruit knife at his waist

Obsessive-compulsive disorder? Or paranoia?

Yang Tian smiled bitterly, rolled up his cuffs and looked at the crisscrossed scars on his forearm. However, why did such a picture remind him of Gerrard? The father who fed the baby with his blood all over his body

"Grass" Yang Tian cursed in his mouth, and the sharp tip of the knife made a fierce stroke on his arm. His mouth was covered with a bloody breath in his mouth. There was no deep desire in his heart, but Yang Tian sadly found that this fishy ** was so delicious. He was addicted to it, and he was unable to quit it.

"I'm really going crazy." He grabbed his head in pain, staggered to stand up, walked back to the dormitory, and opened the door. The familiar and strange faces in the room subconsciously looked at themselves. The dormitory, which was originally full of laughter, disappeared at the moment Yang Tian walked in.

Face by one, a pair of eyes looked at each other. The people in the room turned their heads one after another and looked absent-mindedly at the computer on the table or the books in their hands. The pretended appearance made people like Yang Tian can see through at a glance

"I can see through it. If it's Han Jingyi, you" Yang Tian muttered to himself and suddenly stopped, and his roommates were obviously not surprised by Yang Tian's neurotic appearance. No one talked to him or talk to him.

I'm sorry to bother you. Yang Tian sighed gently in his heart, turned around and walked out of the dormitory, closed the door, stood outside the door, looking at the people coming and going up the stairs, and there was a burst of confusion in his heart

In the dormitory behind him, there was a warm voice, which stung Yang Tian's eardrums and urged Yang Tian to move away his lost legs.

Maybe he is really not suitable for here. Three days ago, in the dead of night, Yang Tian sat up from **, sweating profusely, and shouting, 'Dodge! You will die!' At that time, the sleeping roommates woke up one after another. Looking at Yang Tian, whose face was haggard and sweating, no one dared to accuse him of disturbing their rest, but their eyes contained complex emotions, with a trace of fear, a trace of doubt, a trace of panic, and even a trace of fear. The tense atmosphere made Yang Tian put on his clothes and leave the dormitory. Looking at the dark night in the sky, just like this time, he didn't know where to go.

Yang Tian doesn't want to admit that he has fallen, but in fact, he really is.

I vent in the gym crazily every day, and the ** of the hotel always lies on the white body at night.

For nearly a month, Yang Tian clicked the same number every time he came. It was not that he fell in love with the past or a note. Female, but for him, everyone is the same, just a tool to vent.

To Yang Tian's surprise, when she slept with her for about the seventh time, the panting woman hugged her body tightly and muttered in her ear, "I love you."

Yang Tian finally exhausted himself day and night, suppressing the thoughts and misses that were integrated into the bone marrow to the minimum. However, now he let a soft word ignite the explosive barrel, remembering the Kelly who shared the joys and sorrows with him, couldn't wait to rub herself into her body, and the one who was willing to do for herself. Daiphne waited bitterly and was gentle and stubborn. Of course, there was another one who paid silently for herself without asking for a trace of reward, but she easily failed Han Jingyi, who made a promise to her. Yang Tian silently closed his eyes and rose up madly again? What is love? Don't be tainted by love for such a pure thing to go to bed. Love is too heavy to bear.

Yang Tian is not stupid. Maybe she said this just to ask for an extra piece of paper printed with numbers, or maybe she has said to different people too many times. The habitual opening is just an uproar in Yang Tian's heart, but she can no longer be silent.

Time passed slowly. There were more and more wounds on Yang Tian's body, and there were more and more times when he inadvertently fell into imagination. There were no people every day. After a classmate accidentally saw Yang Tian's muddle-headed figure outside the school, he finally couldn't stand Yang Tian's behavior. This classmate who was quite good with Yang Tian called. Knowing Yang Tian's family, in fact, this classmate tried very hard to enlighten Yang Tian, but he couldn't see any effect. He had to let Yang Tian fall, but he was more and more worried. This time, finally, he picked up the phone, not to the teacher, but to the man who had picked up the plane and left a phone number for the two together. Zi, Yang Tian's cousin, is also Yang Tian's only family here

At the dining table, the wine and vegetables were plentiful. The gentle and graceful sister-in-law looked at Yang Tian worriedly and left silently. The nearly 30-year-old man sitting opposite Yang Tian was also silent and glanced at the inadvertently leaked scars under Yang Tian's collar. The man secretly fell in his heart. It was decided that maybe it was time to inform Yang Tian's parents, and maybe it was time to take the child to see a psychologist.

There were empty wine jars on the ground on the table. The man finally began to get to the point. He pointed to Yang Tian's wound and whispered in a joking tone, "Who did it? Did you go to be a little brother with someone?"

"No, I scratched it by accident." Yang Tianxia consciously pulled the collar with his hand, but he didn't expect that the cuffs of his raised hand fell, revealing a dense scar.

"Why self-abuse? Do you have this kind of perverted psychology? Brother?" The man still spoke lightly, and it was not difficult to hear a trace of worry contained in the joke words, and it was a little serious.

"I'm a patient in your eyes. You feel that I'm hopeless. Maybe you will go to the toilet. Of course, maybe you will be more conservative and call my parents after I leave. Maybe you are still thinking about how to persuade me to go to the hospital for a check-up." Yang Tian looked up and poured a can of beer and glanced at the man.

The man was slightly stunned and was actually seen through. What he said was almost the same as what he thought in his heart. When the seemingly harmless young man in front of him, when his eyes seemed to be swept over his eyes, he actually had a feeling of being seen clearly by ** naked, which surprised the man!

"Don't tell my parents. I don't want them to worry. I will cooperate with all your arrangements." Yang Tian shrugged his shoulders, threw away the empty wine can, and whispered.

"There may be something wrong with my spirit, paranoia, or something else. Obviously, my self-control is very good. Don't worry, I won't hurt you. I'm really not your opponent in the fight, am I?" Yang Tian shrugged his shoulders, looked at the thoughtful man in front of him, smiled and said, "Cousin, are you satisfied with this answer?"

The man frowned and thought about how to convince his cousin, but he didn't expect that the young man opposite seemed to have a certain understanding of his own situation, but to the point where he didn't go to the hospital, he went to see a psychologist at best and find a way to get rid of his cousin's self-abuse.

"Paranoia, obsessive-compulsive disorder" Yang Tian curled his lips and smiled, opened a can of beer again, gently put it on the table, and laughed at himself in his tone: "Maybe that bullshit syndrome is more suitable for my current situation. It's ridiculous. How can I get this kind of thing?"

The man laughed hoarsely and looked at the familiar and strange cousin in front of him. He didn't know how he became like this. Maybe he really had a mental problem. As for the syndrome, the man sneered. Of course, he knew what Yang Tian was talking about, but he was so young and was at home every day. How could a young man under the protection of long wings have been on the battlefield, and how could he have experienced all kinds of cruel torture?

"You are nothing more than a young man stained with bad habits. Maybe in your opinion, the pressure from your parents' family can't bear your weak heart, so you choose to escape and choose to be cowardice. You just want to immerse yourself in your own world to vent and evade responsibility! Or which girlfriend's stimulation comes from? A little thing makes you decadent like this! I can tell you without going to the doctor at all!" The man said in a low voice, picked up the beer and poured it up. Looking at Yang Tian, who bowed his head and said no, the man frowned again! Without refutation, no words, or even an angry expression, Yang Tian seemed to be immersed in his own world again and turned a deaf ear to everything.

Is it exciting from your girlfriend? She did constitute a thick and colorful stroke in my life. Without her, maybe I would have been lost in the vast sea of corpses. A beautiful face appeared in Yang Tian's mind. The crystal corners of his mouth rose slightly, with a warm and intoxicating smile, as if I were keeping my promise and waiting for my return.

"Drinking!" The man may feel that what he just said was too heavy, and he didn't know what to say at this time, so he had to pick up the beer and put it into his mouth.

Yang Tian also picked up the beer, but the memories in his mind were out of control. Too many past, too many pasts, too many beautiful memories made Yang Tian have nowhere to escape. Despite the killing, despite the confusion, although in that world, survival is often more cruel than fate, Yang Tian has to admit that with blood. The outline of life has become the main theme of his life. He has fallen too deep to extricate himself.

"Brother, let me ask you a question. Please promise to answer me honestly." Yang Tian suddenly opened his mouth with a hoarse voice.

The man's face was solemn. He never thought that people's eyes could be mixed with such complex emotions. After a long silence, the man said, "I promise you listen to my arrangement, and I will answer you honestly."

He looked up and poured a whole can of beer. Yang Tian flattened the can in his hand, lowered his head, looked at the criscrossed scars on his arm, with a trace of confusion in his tone, and asked in a low voice, "Why is life so painful, or is it only like this when he was young?"

The man's face was stunned, and he blurted out words that he wanted to comfort him, but he remembered the promise just now, Yang Tian's eyes, and himself in this world. Although it was a peaceful era, everyone who survived had his own unspeakable pain.

There was a silence in the room, and the atmosphere was depressing. Even the sound of the woman watering flowers in the living room could be heard clearly

"You promised that you would answer me truthfully." Just as the man was about to speak, Yang Tian suddenly opened his mouth.

After hesitating for a long time, the man sighed gently and said slowly, "It's always like this."

"Where have you been?" On the phone, it was my cousin's angry voice. When he woke up in the morning, Yang Tian had disappeared. Fortunately, his mobile phone is still on.

"Gone to school and say hello to your roommate." Yang Tian said silently.

"I think you should come back now, or, where are you now? I'll pick you up!" The man said eagerly.

"No, after making an appointment with a doctor, just come to the school dormitory to see me." Yang Tian hung up the phone, and the purpose was the devastated prosperity on both sides of the street.

Every minute, every second, survival in this prosperous world is a cruel torture for him. Every soldier's cheer in his mind and every promise are tore and torture Yang Tian's heart.

Looking at the people coming and going, Yang Tian, who didn't know what they were looking for, laughed at himself. In that world, he used to be so out of place, looking for the direction of coming. When he really returned to the beginning, he sadly found that he was still out of place with this peaceful and prosperous world. Everything about me has been left in the cruel fate of blood and minced meat, which is perfectly integrated.

"Why, why in this unconttain world? I have changed it once, but it has changed so deeply that I can't find the original appearance." After passing by many people, Yang Tian's lax eyes gradually became firm and took a step!!!

In the dormitory, there is still a depressing atmosphere, but Yang Tian no longer cares. He opens the cabinet and slowly starts the computer.

On the screen with a black background, Yang Tian clicked on the icon that changed his fate.

Is

loaded into archive 1?

Yang Tian stopped and looked at the familiar option. The mouse moved to the square and stopped.

"For me, this world should be the place where the hell pass really transmits. The heaven pass doesn't live up to its name." In a low voice, with a wry smile, the slightly trembling fingers gently nodded after a short hesitation

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