Chapter 1 Looking for a house

What's wrong with this society now? After Apple came out, the threshold of pretending has dropped to such a low level. - Zhang Deshuai's Quotation

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Today is a good day. The perpetual calendar says that it is appropriate to build a house today, which is really a good day. Building a house is not to live in, but I rent a house to live in. From this perspective, looking for a house is the same as building a house.

For today's victory, I was cruel, turned around and roared luxuriously at the boss's wife: "Add an egg!" TNND, but not. The boss's wife was stunned, and then walked to me with elegant steps. The boss's wife weighed enough. The boss's wife slowly put a fried egg in my bowl and then smiled at me gently. The treatment of adding an egg is immediately different. As usual, the boss's wife has never smiled at me like this. What is the feeling of a rich man? Add an egg and it will be reflected immediately. To sum up, a word, a rich man is an egg. If you have the same idea as those who hold a gold card for 250,000 or 880,000 at the counter of the bank, it shows that you are also the owner who doesn't have a gold card.

After eating the noodles, I took out five yuan from my pocket and patted it on the table gracefully: "Boss, change." The boss's wife wiped her hands, glanced at the five yuan on the table, and said to me, "There's still 50 cents left." Forget, forget that I just added an egg. With the boss's wife's words, the rich man's feeling was like a big and round soap bubble. If I had taken out ten yuan just now, the feeling of the rich would not have disappeared so easily. As soon as I blushed, I took out another 50 cents from my pocket, stuffed it into the boss's hand, and left brimly. It's really not good to go out.

On my way to the bus station, I was stopped by a man in a dirty robe - let's put it this way, you can't help but see him in the middle and lower part of the body (if you often watch the weather forecast, you will know where it is) - shouted: "Young man, look at your seal There is black gas, and a bad omen will come to your head in the past two days. Remember that.

Street fortune tellers are all like this. First, they will bluff you with big words, then blow you up and make you confused, and then wait for you to pay out obediently. As a firm atheist deeply influenced by Marx and Lenin's (harmonious) thought, I will not be easily. That's because I had a lesson in this regard: At that time, I, a young man (saying how old I am now) was still studying on a beautiful university campus. When I went out to play, I was pulled by an old man who set up a street stall, and then told me that at the age of 24, there would be beautiful women to be hugged, and as rich as Li Ka-shing. When I said that I'm 25 and still studying, I don't have a girlfriend yet. After hearing this, the old man blinked his eyes, grabbed my hand, and said to me deeply, "Youth, knowledge changes fate!" It seems that fortune tellers are also philosophers.

I was about to leave when the old man said another word and pulled back the leg I was about to step on: "You usually eat noodles without eggs, but you added an egg this morning. I'm not sure. If not, you can leave.

My heart tightened, and I felt that the five yuan in my pocket was about to open its wings and leave me like a white angel. The following is a teaching of idealism by the Taoist priest. Anyway, you are destined to be rich and noble. Now there are villains who bully you and make you restless. You are caught by the city management when you post a small advertisement because there are villains behind your back. This little man wants to prevent you from getting rich and well-off. I have a monk here who has gone away. No, it's a shining jade pendant for you. Don't worry, this jade pendant is free of charge. If it's not, it can't be sold. It's not sold to you. It's what you want to invite, but in order to show your sincerity, you need to pay some "please" fee. How much does it cost? It only costs 19.8 yuan. Only 198, only 198, you can "please" go home. Listen, are you familiar? If I add a man and a woman host, are you more familiar with it?) Once you buy it, you will benefit from immortality, and you deserve it. Then, I sincerely "invited" the jade pendant to my neck.

I didn't realize it until I got on the bus. I was fooled just now. Have you ever seen a Taoist priest find a monk to enlighten him? What is superstition? Superstition is to be confused before believing. Lessons, lessons, bloody RMB lessons, how many small advertisements do I have to post for this 19.8 yuan? Summarize with a poem: No one has died since ancient times, and it is not good to step on shit when going out. The hero often sighed to the sky, and there was a dog walker in front of him.

(Later, I found out why this jade pendant was bought once and benefited forever - it faded and often made the piece of my neck green. When someone else saw this part, he asked me: Brother, did you come from Nami Star to save the earth?)

The bus is driving on the bumpy road, and my stomach is bumpy with the car. The fried eggs in the morning always want to give me a rumin. Life is always dog-blooded. Unexpectedly, the driver suddenly stretched his head out of the window of the car. He actually vomited, and he vomited gorgeously. Driver, are you sure you just have an upset stomach and not because of carsickness?

After more than an hour of bumps, the car finally threw me in front of a small building and went away, with a black smoke and a piece of dust, which was very unenvironmentally friendly.

I took out my retro Nokia blue screen mobile phone. I am a very nostalgic person (in fact, I don't have so much spare money to change my mobile phone). Our retro mobile phones also had a very cool moment. At 5.12 that year, when other mobile phones had no signal, our mobile phone signal was just right. Mobile phones with high transmission power were white angels in their last life. I took out my mobile phone and looked at the time. It was still early, and there was still half an hour before the appointed time.

I will walk around my single-family villa in the future, and I am basically satisfied. It is initially estimated that this building is older than me. I didn't say that I am a very nostalgic person, but he is cheap. In this material era, people like us whose income has always been lower than the average income of the city can also live in a villa, not a townhouse or a detached house. In a few days, I will find a few more tenants like me. At that time, I will ask them 100 yuan for rent alone, and I will become a renter. Hey hey!

In my imagination, a taxi stopped in front of the small building, and a man in a white shirt and suit trousers came down from the car. I suddenly recognized him as an intermediary who was going to rent me a house. Why is this (this sentence should be read in the tone of little Shenyang)? In this hot summer, people who insist on wearing suits are either insurance sellers or intermediaries, and insurance sellers generally do not choose to take a taxi. Such a rigorous logical analysis is about to catch up with Holmes. What the teacher said when praising me lingered in my ears again: "This child, you didn't get into Peking University. It's a blessing for you or Peking University."

As soon as the suit trousers man got out of the car, the taxi immediately flew away, raising half of the dust in the sky and calling out to the suit trousers man's white shirt, mixing with the sweat stains on his body, which was an abstract painting of Mondrian. Anyway, I'm sure he will wash his shirt when he goes back today. I'm still smart. I put on a T-shirt that can't distinguish the original color, with HTTP404PageNotFound printed on it, and I'm not afraid of getting dirty.

"Are you Mr. Zhang Deshuai?" The man in suit trousers stretched out his hand to me, "I'm sorry to keep you waiting for a long time. The road here is not easy to walk, and the driver is unwilling to come. I'm afraid of absorbing the shock."

"Nothing, I just arrived." I grabbed his hand and shook it.

"Then let's take a look at the house first." After saying that, the suit man took out a bunch of keys and poked the door. After making an awkward sound, the door finally opened.

When we walked into the house, a few withered yellow leaves fell from the dead yellow trees in front of the door, swirling in the air, hitting the mottled outer wall of the small building and falling straight down.

As the door was pushed open, a wind mixed with a rotten smell blew out of the door hole, and the suit man and I couldn't help shivering. It's ten o'clock in the morning, and the harsh sun is desperately scorting his light and heat, but the room is cold. It's just like the cold water to pour the head, holding the ice in my arms, and the hair on my body is brushing like Indian divine oil.

In fact, there is nothing to see. There is nothing to look at carefully in the empty room. After turning around every room with the suit trousers man, the suit trousers man has been chattering on the side. The house is so cool that there is only air conditioning electricity left in summer, which can save hundreds of electricity bills a month. Now there are water, electricity and gas. If you live, you can immediately have three links. Living alone, such as If you want to find a few more rent-sharing, it's hard to find such a cheap house with lanterns...

After seeing the house, I am basically satisfied. It's a little pity that the floor is made of wood, and people make waves of noises stepping on it, which makes people feel uncomfortable. There are also obvious signs of rats in the room. Several mouse shit are showing off to us, indicating that the real owner of the house is them. The key is cheap, which has overshadowed all other regrets. I also want to be a chartered rent in the future, and we can also become a landlord, although this landlord is second-hand.

Looking that I didn't mean to object, the man in the suit quickly took out the house lease contract and asked me to sign it. I wrote my name on it casually: Zhang Deshuai. Looking at the three dragon flying and phoenix dance words, I am very satisfied, although they write very much like me, at least they look very kind. It's just that I didn't read the small words in the contract carefully: the lease period of this house is at least one year, and the lease cannot be refunded unless there is force majeure.

After signing the contract, the suit trousers man looked at me meaningfully, opened his mouth and wanted to say anything, but he didn't say anything. He stretched out his hand to shake me, and then fled the small building. ( Later, I added the following sentences here: In this diary, this escape is the best used. At that time, I didn't know why I used the word escape. When I understood it, I felt that I was present, which proved that I had the potential to be a Taoist priest. Then there are a few big words: people who wear suits in summer can't believe it, especially those who only wear suit trousers. Disclaimer, Xiaosheng inadvertently hurt anyone here. It's just a joke. Don't take it seriously.)

Holding the contract in my hand, my heart is like a blooming flower. The happy and uncontrollable joy is like the boiling boiled water, with bubbles from the bottom of my heart: we finally have a house, so we don't have to worry about sleeping on the street.

When I started the phone, I called Kong Ergou and prepared to ask him to move my things here. Kong Ergou told me that the car was lent out to pull the dead body, and it would have to wait until tomorrow. I forgot to tell you that the things in Kong Ergou logistics also include people, whether they are alive or dead)