chapter 75 tired

I don't know anything, I... I don't know anything, and I won't know in the future, and I will never know.

When we walked to the ward and knocked on the door, we saw a long-haired woman sitting on the bench outside my ward with loose hair and wearing the same ward as me. She was very thin and thinner than me. That was the kind that looked malnourished. The bones protruded under the wide medical clothes, which gave people a terrible kind. The feeling. She buried her face in her chest very low, and her long hair covered her cheeks so that she couldn't see her original appearance.

Xiaoyi and I are very strange. We really doubt that she is a ghost.

Xiaoyi protected me behind me and approached slowly. When I came to her, I recognized the woman.

Qian Rui.

Except for her, his first reaction was to look back at me. Fortunately, my expression was quite calm, which made him not have any doubts. I smiled at him and said, "Go in quickly. How horrible it is."

Xiao Yi was stunned for a moment and nodded decisively. We quickly flashed into the ward, locked the door, and did all the precautions.

I ate it happily with the powder that was still smoking. Xiaoyi sat aside with his iPad and began to play by himself.

I felt very choked as I ate, and tears flowed down drop by drop, spilling into the soup of steamed vermicelli roll. But the tears still can't stop, flowing and flowing.

I always thought I had shed tears, really. But the next time I cried, I found that I was more turbulent than any tears, strong, right? I also want to know why? Just like the world is impermanent, but I always encounter something unprepared, and those children who are favored by fate will never understand.

I think I am a huge disaster star, harming the people around me.

So, as long as the people I am involved with, they will never be happy, such as my parents. When they used to make a fuss at home, they always shouted that they were together, which simply confirmed the old saying, "If you make a wrong marriage, it will harm three generations." But they have to say that they didn't divorce for me, so I have thought I was the culprit of their unhappiness since I was a child. If it hadn't been for my fetching, they would have been able to find their own happiness, and they wouldn't have fought every day like that.

I blame myself. I wonder why I should appear in this world? Why can I make my parents unhappy? Why?

Even if I am numb now, I will still blame myself. That kind of pain to the bone and incompetence, I will feel helpless...

Finally, I simply pushed away the bowl in front of me and cried with my knees in my arms.

Li Luo...

Why is it Li Luo?!

Why is the protagonist of the jump off the building incident Li Luo? Is it really what I said at that time? If you die, I will forgive you. Do you take it seriously? I've said so many words. I said that I want you to be happy. I want you to live a good life and have a happy life. Why didn't you listen to it? Why do I ask you to die and you can listen to it?

Ha...

When did you start to listen to me so much? It really stunned me.

Or do you really lose everything to life? There is really nothing to make you a reason to live. You become and sometimes I have to despair. There is no way, and you finally choose to die. Haha, I still really appreciate your directness. It's in place in one step. It's not like I cut so many knives that I can't die. Honey, don't you think that you successfully pushed me into an eternal abyss by committing suicide, which makes me lose face?

Is it because Qian Rui and your child are missing? So that's the reason why you can support it. The child is gone, and you are gone.

I don't see how gratified I am that you have that attitude towards our children. Then don't you love her? Don't you think you're too selfish to leave her alone and commit suicide? You still always say that I look like a child, and you are more like me. You think the world has abandoned you. You just think you will abandon the world, but you have never thought about whether the world will care about your abandonment. If it doesn't matter, won't you fail?

Ha, you are so fucking stupid.

Xiao Yi ignored me and adjusted the sound of playing the game to the maximum, completely covering my voice.

I cried for a while and cried enough. I cleaned up with hiccups, pulled the curtain by the bed, and opened the window again. As soon as the window was opened, the huge autumn wind outside roared in, blowing my clothes and hair. I know that I'm so weak now. If someone sees it downstairs, they will think it's a female ghost who died unjustly.

I slowly stretched out my hand, and there was a slight raindrop outside in the middle of the palm of my hand. It was very cold.

I remember that year, the temperature when Li Luo handed the perfume he sent me to my palm was the same, freezing to my heart, but I thought it was the warmest atmosphere in the world.

Suddenly, my waist was picked up by a huge force, and I screamed loudly.

Those hands firmly wrapped around my waist and put me directly outside the window. The building is not high, five floors, but it is enough to scare me with incontinence. I grabbed the hands at my waist desperately and cried incoherently in the slightly awe-chilling autumn wind at night...

"Let it down, hurry up, ah... Put it down, hey, help, it's dead... Mom, Zhang Xunyi, let me go quickly... Go down..."

There was a calm voice behind me. I swear, I had never seen him so calm in my life. "Let it go? OK! You said you wanted to put it down. You know I listen to everything, and I will definitely do it if you die!" After saying that, he really loosened one hand and supported my waist with only one arm, so that I shook more violently in the wind.

I couldn't believe it. I looked at his expressionless face with tears in my eyes.

"Ah!!!" I was almost scared. My hands were deeply into his flesh, and my nails were embedded in his skin. "Zhang Xunyi, are you fucking crazy? Hurry up, brother, please, pull me in quickly, please, pull me in... I was wrong..."

I grabbed his arm and kicked his feet on the wall and didn't dare to look down at all. At this time, there were already a lot of people gathered underneath pointing at us, and there was also a knock on the door outside.

The terrible thing is that the door was locked by him, and it will take a while for the doctor to find the key...

I'm really desperate. I really feel like I'm going to be killed by Zhang Xunyi. My dearest and favorite person for so many years, he wants to kill me with his own hands.

"What's wrong?!" He looked at me, and he absolutely didn't want a brother to look at his sister. It was clearly the eyes of Guanyin Bodhisattva, who was looking at the suffering people. That kind of compassion that went deep into the bone marrow made me really want to stab him to death with a knife.

"I was wrong. I shouldn't have lied to you. I know everything!"

As soon as I finished speaking, he stretched out his other hand and pulled me in. At the moment I was pulled in, the door was also opened and a group of people rushed in. There were doctors, nurses and good people who didn't know whether it was watching the bustle or really wanted to save me, but the person who rushed to the front was actually Chen Yi.

I looked at Xiao Yi puzzledly. His hair was messy, and he stood in front of him barefoot as if he were standing in front of him without clothes.

Tears are broken.

I opened my mouth and was about to say something when a sudden slap completely interrupted my thoughts.

I covered my face and didn't go to see the person who hit me, but squatted underground. A group of doctors and nurses made me sick in order to come over**.

I heard a cry from the other side. Xiaoyi raised his hand and punched Chen Yi back almost with more than ten times the strength that had just slapped me. I closed my eyes, looked sincerely at the nurse closest to me, and said devoutly, "Please inject me with sleeping pills. I want to sleep."

The nurse was stunned and looked at the doctor who was examining me. The doctor looked at me and nodded.

Xiaoyi and Chen Yi are still fighting over there. The scene is chaotic, but I can sleep happily.

My world is also chaotic.

I'm a lazy person. I don't like to make things too complicated, because I'm too lazy to sort them out one by one, just like now. My dearest person put me in a dangerous situation and wanted to kill me. I probably know the reason. Chen Yi also knew it in the hospital. He rushed in and slapped me. I probably misunderstood everything. Look, although I don't want to sort it out, I can still sort out the general outline.

I know what Xiaoyi is going to do, I know.

He thought I was going to commit suicide. He thought that I knew that Li Luo would be very vulnerable. He wanted to jump off the window sill to feel the moment when he opened his arms and flew before landing like him. He thought it was all his own.

There is no denying that although I want to do that, I won't.

I'm still going to England, and I have to live well to reunite with my irresponsible parents. I also have a boyfriend who is countless times more handsome than Li Luo and falls in love. He will give me a better gift at Christmas. I also want to wear Verawang's wedding dress and Tiffany's diamond ring to get married. I want to have children, watch them grow up and then leave home and go out alone.

So, dear, don't you understand that you don't know that I won't do that? Throw me out of the window so that the whole world can see that I'm going to commit suicide and you save me, and then let the whole world punish me for you.

Is it necessary for you to do this? How long have you been struggling to make such a crazy move? I know that you have made countless resolutions, because you are afraid that you will become real as soon as you make a mistake, and I have also become a past tense, and we will never see each other.

What you want is not like this.

You just want to punish me, I know.